Party On, Darth

by ranpen on April 5, 2010

Life Size Darth Vader

This is a lifesize Darth Vader cutout. Measures over 6′ tall. Call ——- or email if interested.

Thanks,
Gary

From: Randy Penny
Sent: Sat 4/4/10  2:08 PM
To: sale———–@craigslist.org

LUUUKKKKKE….I AM YOUR FATHERRRRRR
GARYYYYYY…..I AM INTERESTED IN YOUR LIFESIZE DARTH VADER!

Is it still available?

Thanks,
RP

From: Gary——-
Sent: Sat 4/4/10 11:31 PM
To: Randy Penny

Randy,

Yes it is

From: Randy Penny
Sent: Mon 4/5/10 8:45 AM
To: Gary——–

Gary,
A long time ago in a galaxy far far away,  I believed that I might one day find a Darth Vader cut-out.  And now, it seems that I have.  Turmoil has engulfed the Galactic Republic (that I’ve replicated in my basement).  The taxation of trade routes to outlying star systems is in dispute, and I am hoping to resolve the matter with a blockade of deadly battleships….
Darth Vader…the most formidable villain of all time.  I am on a fateful mission to Endor, and I will not surrender to the Imperial Stormtroopers.  It is you, Gary, who can help fulfill my destiny.
When might I capture Darth Vader?  Or, will you bring him to me?

P.S. Do you have any lightsabers?

Thanks,
RP

From: Gary——-
Sent: Mon 4/5/10 5:51 PM
To: Randy Penny

Hey Randy,

When would you like to “capture” him.  I’ll be home tonight.

Address is: ————–

Just south of Q St on ——.   Not quite a galaxy far far away.

Thanks,

Gary.

From: Randy Penny
Sent: Tue 4/6/10 8:51 AM
To: Gary——–

Gary,
My sincerest apologies.  Last night was not the appropriate time for capture.  I have not fully completed my Jedi training, a complex system of highly regimented and organized procedures.  And, though I am not yet a master, I have two apprentices under my tutelage.  You see, Gary, it will be us that might one day need to protect the world,  using our knowledge of the sword to deflect enemy lasers into floating orb droids.  For I might never know when I will be both physically and mentally prepared to apprehend Darth Vader.  Perhaps tonight.  Perhaps next year.  I can promise that you’ll be informed.  But, until that day comes, may the force be with you….

Thanks,
RP

From: Gary——-
Sent: Mon 4/6/10 12:41 PM
To: Randy Penny

Randy

I have someone else interested in it, so let me know if you still want it.

From: Randy Penny
Sent: Tue 4/6/10 1:28 AM
To: Gary——–

Gary,
Is this “someone else” a true master of his craft, fully intent on both strategically and successfully capturing a force of evil such as Darth Vader?  Is this “someone else” as deserving of victory as I am? Does this someone else have adequate transportation?

P.S. Do you have any lightsabers?

Thanks,
RP

From: Gary——-
Sent: Mon 4/6/10 5:25 PM
To: Randy Penny

Randy,

When do you want to pick it up? I’ll be home tonight. It does fold up so it will fit in a car. Sorry, no lightsabers.

From: Randy Penny
Sent: Tue 4/7/10 10:09 AM
To: Gary——–

Gary,
Capturing Darth Vader undoubtedly requires extraordinary preparation, unwavering confidence, and full concentration.  When I am truly prepared, my apprentices and I will inform you of our strategy.  Likely, it will need to be a stealthy mission, executed in the middle of the night or mid-morning, when Darth Vader least expects to be apprehended.  You say he will fit in a car,  but will he fit in the undercarriage of an Intergalactic Space Module?

Thanks,
RP

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